Thursday, April 2, 2009

"Altitudinal" PowerPoint Tips From IBM-- a humorous guide for tech sales folks

Thought you might enjoy some IBM humor on how to adjust your powerpoint for your audience. They LOVE to talk about things from "10.000 feet" or "30,000" feet. Evidently, they are confusing customers, so here are there new guidelines. ;-) Do note the date of the directive.

SWG Directive

April 1, 2009

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To: All SWG professionals who deliver customer-facing presentations

Date: 04/01/2009

In response to widespread confusion on the part of customers and IBMers, the following presentation standards are today being announced by IBM SWG.

Issue

Inconsistent and arbitrary use of altitudes when delivering product presentations.

Details

The use of notional altitudes (e.g., "30,000-foot view") is a potentially effective device for describing the level of content of a presentation. Such imagery can lend color to one's presentation and set the customer at ease in regard to the level of technical content that he may expect. However, unconstrained use of this metaphor can lead to inconsistent interpretations of the various altitudes and confused messages from IBM. For example, one customer complained that in a 5,000-foot view of Lotus Notes he was unable to see a Connection document, whereas in a 50,000-foot view of Tivoli Access Manager he could read the details of a failover cookie on an inbound browser request. Another customer complained of dizziness and blurred vision during a presentation that alternated randomly between 60,000 feet and 90,000 feet. Such inconsistency is injurious to our professional reputation and may adversely affect the health of our customers.

Resolution

Effective immediately, the following guidelines are to be followed when delivering altitude-based presentations.

Admissible altitudes

Only the following altitudes are to be used:

1,000 feet

5,000 feet

10,000 feet

50,000 feet

100,000 feet

Please note that the use of any other altitude will be considered a violation of these guidelines unless prior authority is obtained.

Altitude assignments

Audience

Content (example)

Suggested altitude

Programmer

Product API

1,000 feet

CTO

Product technology

5,000 feet

Analyst

Product architecture

10,000 feet

CIO

IT value

50,000 feet

CEO

Business value

100,000 feet

Note: The above are for guidance only. Presenters are expected to use their discretion when pitching their presentations, taking into account conditions such as audience acrophobia, supported climb rates, etc.

Altitude transitions

In order to minimize customer confusion, at most three altitude transitions are permitted within a single presentation. Further, such transitions must be monotonic, i.e., all must be decreasing or all must be increasing. Please bear this in mind when setting your initial and final altitudes, taking into account the set of admissible altitudes as above. Please also consider the resilience of your audience to sudden and unexpected changes of altitude.

Presentation formats

A new set of mandatory presentation templates customized for your business unit are being prepared. These templates contain a configurable altimeter icon on each slide. Presenters must ensure that this altimeter is set to the correct value for each slide and clearly visible to the audience.

FAQs

In order to expand on a certain point in my presentation, I need to change altitudes and temporarily move to the whiteboard. Do I get an extra transition in addition to what is allowed in the base presentation?

No, any temporary use of other media is considered to be a continuation of the same presentation. However, if multiple presentations are being given consecutively, then the altitude is reset at the start of each presentation, provided that the audience is given sufficient time to adjust to any applicable change from the previous presentation. Alternatively, a mid-presentation break can be scheduled according to the following table:

Break length

Equivalent altitude change

5 minutes

1-5,000 feet

10 minutes

10,000 feet

15 minutes

50,000 feet

20 minutes

100,000 feet

My customer has set 40,000 feet as the standard altitude for all vendor presentations. Do I need IBM approval to present at that altitude?

IBM approval will be provided on presentation of an appropriate letter from the customer.

I need to present to the CEO of a large corporation. May I present at 150,000 feet?

No. Our products have not been tested beyond 100,000 feet. You may wish to consider asking the CIO to attend your session.

Are there any plans to approve additional altitudes?

IBM will monitor and assess the effectiveness of the supported altitudes. Consideration may be given to expanding this set over time according to business and technical requirements.

Questions?

Please contact IBM Altitude Enforcement/Somers/IBM if you have any questions regarding this directive.

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